Where shall I begin? If you have been following my blogs, then you will unlikely know that my mother suffered a brain aneurysm resulting in a stroke and dementia. The aneurysm happened in April of 2013. Our mother has been a resident at the Pines in Whiting, NJ. I can still recall the many hours of visiting her and the pain of seeing the suffering that she went through.
Our mother passed away on April 28, 2021. I do know that she went home to be with God, the Father. She was definitely a fighter. In an earlier blog post, I alluded to something happening in the background. When it comes to the caring of one’s parent, it is a time-consuming job.
However, I didn’t want to dive into a blog post helping others through their grief and not share my own story. If you prefer, I’ve posted an audio podcast for you to listen to. Though she’s gone, my mother is never forgotten and loved. I’d like to share God has help in this ordeal.
I want to thank you for taking the time to go pass the introduction to this blog post. Though I have written a wide variety of blog posts, it is never an easy thing to share of how God has helped my family and I through these challenging times. For many new readers, they just stumbled across this blog post and have no idea of what I’m talking about.
They just saw the part about grieving the loss of a mother due to a brain aneurysm. Therefore, I’d like to share briefly what happened so the new person can understand where I’m coming from. In April 2013, my mother suffered a brain aneurysm. It resulted in a stroke leaving her partially paralyzed on the left side. Sadly, dementia was also in the mix.
When it comes to caring for an elderly parent, it can be quite challenging. At first, we only saw the physical results from the stroke. The dementia thankfully didn’t show up until later. It didn’t take long before it became apparent.
Do you know what the waiting list is for someone to get into a nursing home, before the pandemic? It’s quite long. I thank my Heavenly Father for opening a door at a nearby nursing home called the Pines. It made visiting our mother, a lot easier. It’s definitely by God’s grace we got to enjoy our mother before she passed.
Some years ago, I wrote a blog post called “Thoughts for Father’s Day” and it was written in June 2015. That blog post is rather fitting because its point is true, today. Though sadden by the loss of my mother, I am glad for the opportunity to spend time with her. I most certainly have to give Jesus the credit for healing our relationship.
I also have also had to thank God for giving me the strength to visit the skilled nursing section, at the nursing home. Am I overdoing it? Think, again! My mother and I did not always get along with each other. My mother and I are both strong willed and opinionated individuals. Unfortunately, I take after both my parents.
When it came time to move in with her, I prayed and asked God, “I’ll go. But I need you to be there!” I’m not kidding because I knew that I desperately needed help. It seems that I wasn’t the only one. My mother’s siblings had the same concerns. God heard me and reassured me that he’d be there. Oh thank you Jesus! Thank you for being there!
It is because of Jesus; my mother and I enjoyed a healing relationship. It’s because of my Father’s grace, I was able to spend time when she needed it. God is no respecter of person. If you ask, Jesus is able to do the same thing for you.
Since my mother’s passing, these wonderful memories do not disappear. With my physical disabilities, you might think that I’ve more time than the average person. Not so fast! Do you suppose this WordPress account magically appeared? Do you suppose that I started my YouTube channel then the Christianity Explained blog site?
Before Christianity Explained, I had a blog site called Inspiration Point. I opened an account with WordPress in 2009 and kept writing blog posts for that site. Yes, I was living with my mother at the time. For 4 years, I’d regularly write for that blog site. Suddenly, April 2013 happened and my priorities changed with it.
Don’t kid yourself! It takes a lot of work to regularly create contents for any platform. By the way, I was only focused on writing. Do you know what happened to that site? It tanked because I was overwhelmed in the care of my mother. My goal is to write encouraging stories designed to help people in their struggles.
Yet, I am the one who’s hurting and in need of help. It also did not help that I suffered from a lack of confidence in my writing. I really did have a lot of emotional turmoil and rollercoaster to deal with. Thankfully, Jesus was faithful in providing friends and a silly game called Minecraft. No, I wouldn’t recommend losing oneself in a video game. However, it does help to take a fun break.
It also helps to develop friends in the local community. These friends were a great help. Don’t be afraid to ask God, the Father to provide help in your time of grief or stress. Remember, you are NOT alone! The same thing can be said of my home church. They were of help, too. Ever heard of an old antiquated invention called “a phone”?
Do not be afraid to pick up your smartphone and call someone. Hey, it’s not that smart. You have to call the person. It can’t do it, for you.
As for my mother, things did get a lot harder. The dementia was getting worse. If you read the first paragraph, you’ll notice that she died in April 2021. My mother is a strong woman for someone who’s not in great health. It’s why I’m not surprised that this native of Newark, NJ last this long. We didn’t stop visiting her, though.
For other members of my family, it was an emotionally rough time. Yet, everyone visited when they could. I know that it is challenging and rough to see one’s loved one go through this and it’s very tempting to stop. I’d like to encourage you to do the best that you can. Be not afraid to ask God for help. If God can help my family and I then Jesus can help you. He’s no respecter of person.
In the end, you’ll be glad that you did spend time with your loved ones. Though mourning comes in the night; joy comes in the morning and a new day will begin. No, you will not for that person! I still remember my father, my younger brother and will continue to remember my mother. Of course, it will take time for you to heal.
Are you suffering from wounds in the past? Do you know that God, the Father is able and willing to heal those wounded memories? That is what God did in my case. It’s why I was able to tell my mother, “I’ll remember you in both truth and love.” It’s true and it include the not so pleasant memories.
Did my life end when my mother passed? Each person heals at a different rate. I honestly believe that I’m honoring my mother by hopping back into the job of being a content creator. My mother believed that I had the ability to be a good writer. In July 2021, I hopped back into the fray of creating contents. It started slowly then proceeded to gain momentum.
I took an unforeseen vacation in October 2021. In January 2022, I pursued the goal of being serious in my determination to contents for my YouTube channel, audio podcast and blog site. The book writing will come in its time.